"Every Strand" author commentary pt. 11

[allekha]

Chapter 41:
base built near Balfalls
I originally called this Stonefalls, then went with the later-game name change/Dunmer version. It feels very half-baked to me, though, because the 'falls' part is the same.

though not as bright as he usually wears it
Generally, in the era before artificial pigments, brighter colors tended to be more expensive and more difficult to produce both in cloth and paintings.

a set of two curves starting over his eyebrows, crossing at the bridge of his nose, and curving again under the opposite eye
Not based on anything in particular except paging through examples of ceremonial face paint from different cultures and seeing that for obvious reasons a lot of them have patterns around the eyes in some form or another.

he swings on a hat woven tightly out of several colors of straw
Nothing too fancy, but taking the time to make a pattern and weave it more tightly would make it a bit nicer than an ordinary farmer's hat.

I enjoyed taking Voryn out of his element again here. As I mentioned in the last commentary, I originally planned to leave Nerevar's past a mystery, but by this point, it felt right to have him reveal parts of it to Voryn - parts and places that are meaningful to how he thinks of his past, even if Voryn never visits his childhood home - despite it also being uncomfortable all around for various reasons.

in some places, it appears naturally in the water
Arsenic in the water, from what I've read, is usually much less as obvious a problem as it is in this fictional little spring and can be a real issue for groundwater in places where arsenic is naturally occurring.

This will be my last visit while I still have my bones
This saying popped into my head as I was writing the sentence, and it seemed fitting for a culture where bones are used to protect descendants or become cremains.

The cave was a last-minute addition to this chapter. I started from the mental image of them looking at a bunch of ancient graffiti, and then it occurred to me why it might have felt special for someone like Nerevar, and then I was also able to tie it into an important point in his life.

It will eat the insect, won't it?
I was surprised to poke through UESP and find that the only mentions of carnivorous plants seem to be in Black Marsh and Valenwood. Nothing in the harsh soils of Morrowind nomming on all their bugs?

aside from one brush with a young attempted thief they caught trying to pick his way past Voryn's locking spell one night
This was planned to be a longer scene, but I realized it didn't add anything that I couldn't sum up well enough in a paragraph of Voryn feeling strange about not being the one who is supposed to be in charge or just getting to do what he wants with someone who tried to rob him.

As I said, I never knew anything about my father. Many people in Mora have human ancestors. Many don't. I have no way of knowing which he was. But I was good enough for Azura's words, so what did it matter?
I think Nerevar having human ancestry is an interesting idea to play with, but for this story, 'I don't know and it doesn't matter' always felt like the right answer, even before I knew we were going to come back to the question.

I was originally planning to write a more detailed sex scene on the cliff, but a) this chapter, like a few of the others, grew on me, and I was getting kind of tired by the time I reached that part, and b) I wasn't sure what emotional purpose it would serve any more, since the beats I had originally thought might be there ended up elsewhere. So I kept it short and sweet.

A scream splits the air
I enjoyed working in one last cliffhanger :D

Chapter 42:
After all that about Almalexia's poisoning phobia and her and Nerevar nearly getting poisoned... we finally take Chekhov's bottle of a mysterious substance down off the wall for another CSI: Mournhold episode.

I felt like I had done a lot of foreshadowing for this chapter, but it's always hard to judge when you know what the endgame is! I sprinkled in various mentions of her feeling like her heart was skipping a beat/touching her heart, feeling tired and having nightmares, the strange skin on her palms - all symptoms of arsenic poisoning - starting back in chapter 34, as well as singling out the color her fingernails were painted and putting in someone who was specifically mentioned to help her with her makeup and nails. Arsenic even came up in the previous chapter.

By the way, it was surprisingly difficult to get a good picture of what a case of arsenic poisoning looks like, but if you need to make any characters suffer, this document was a helpful reference for me. The thickened skin apparently is a later symptom in real-world humans, but hey, fantasy species. Plus there's the bit in ESO saying that Dunmer are prone to skin issues.

Voryn snaps to let her go as he kneels by Nerevar
Voryn has stumbled onto correct advice, though I'm pretty sure you are not supposed to hold someone's head either based on my first aid training, just try to put something soft underneath to protect it.

A gentle heat should soften it enough to remove.
I assume they would be using something like a wax-based formula. I didn't want them to have to run out and grab some fantasy!acetone lol. Plus it brings back Voryn being especially skilled at controlling the strength of his spells.

Her nail has a white line across its width.
These are usually called Mees' lines in our world and are a serious health sign, not only of arsenic poisoning, which seems to be the most famous association with them (though it is a rare symptom of it).

Most of them do suggest feeding a patient ash yams
This is the one bit of the antidote inspired by real life, vaguely, in the sense that arsenic can cause cardiac issues due to causing electrolyte problems > gotta balance those levels > yams and potatoes have a lot of potassium. And ash yams only have good magical properties, so they are probably seen as a healthy food anyway.

Imp gall can work against problems of the nervous system
It can cure magical paralysis in Oblivion and poison in Skyrim.

Boethiah once told Veloth the secret that his servants' tongues are an antidote to various poisons
Hunger tongues have the "cure poison" attribute.

The alchemy steps Voryn goes through are things I just made up for the story.

"I dreamed of this," she eventually says.
One of the books in Morrowind, though (in-universe) historical fiction, attributes the gift of visions to her. Maybe it's one of those things that she had as a mortal and got supercharged after godhood? I feel like this aspect of her character doesn't get brought up very much.

The box holds roobrush, interesting, a choice he hadn't considered, scrib jelly, a good filtering substance, and horn lily bulbs, a favorite of Mournhold's gardens.
The first two are more "cure poison" ingredients, and the horn lily bulb resists paralysis and restores strength, so it seemed like a possible curative agent.

a piece of paper that smells faintly like some variety of garlic
The first arsenic detection test produced a gas that smelled like garlic. I tried to think of something else that seemed a little more magical, but like I said in the author's note, RL was a bit stressful that week, and I ended up leaving it be.

"I do," Nerevar says.
Hint, hint.

Chapter 43:
Though of course we know how every story of every ruler who has tried to enact such protection for themselves has ended.
For instance, they end up dying by a blade, or they share a meal with their wife who hasn't spent half her life eating bits of poison, and she dies horribly instead.

but he crosses the room, undoes his robe, and slides under the covers behind Nerevar.
The Elf Sandwiches as a treat.

Read this one!
Adults can feel awkward about speaking the "wrong" language with someone they know, but I've heard some anecdotes about kids who get very upset about adults doing so.

For some time, I wasn't sure what the very end of the fic should be. I had figured out that Almalexia and Voryn could properly reconcile through him saving her from poison fairly early on, but was that the place to end the story? Having Nerevar and Voryn get not-quite-married but bound in their own way seemed like a good way both to, as she says, tie off a loose end that would put a potential anxiety about their relationships to rest, and reward Voryn with something deeply meaningful for him, as well as reflect the theme of Voryn being so devoted to his clan and closer to his ancestors than his gods, and parallel the beginning of the story where Voryn is watching the two of them get married. (It kind of works with the title, too.)

I could not resist one last indulgent dress-up scene.

Though I dodged a lot of the details of the wedding rituals early on, I could hardly do that here, but since it wasn't meant to be a formalized ritual, I just enjoyed thinking of how they might have set it up and what Voryn might say. The beginning of the ritual was the first section I wrote for this chapter.

And so they are bound in the eyes of Voryn's ancestors.
A direct parallel to a line in chapter 2: "And so they are married." I also wanted the chapter to call back in spirit to one of my favorite lines, all in that chapter: "Not all the days to come will be so bright and happy; but this one is."

In the vague planning stages of this chapter, I thought maybe the story would end with the three of them having dinner afterward or Nerevar and Voryn disappearing into his rooms, but the end of the ritual itself felt like the perfect place to end it.

And thus we finally came to "The End"!

Bits and bobs:
I have a few headcanons about the time after this fic, two of which are set in the time when everything goes to hell: Revalen Indoril can't dodge a determined House Dagoth spy forever and dies slowly and horribly in a way that Almalexia finds quite pleasing, Voryn eventually makes use of the Welkynd stone during the war with the Dwemer, and Ulmis becomes leader of the House for a short while after Voryn (and presumably his brothers) die in the battle at Red Mountain but before the new Tribunal start hunting them down.

Dagoth Ur doesn't really have any reason to cut his hair sitting around under Red Mountain and waiting for Nerevar to show up again, but he definitely doesn't anyway because, you know, Nerevar asked slash ordered him not to, just as he's been waiting loyally for him to return.

My notes says that I apparently gave Councilor Nevas the full name of Nevas Helbith. I guess I thought surnames might be useful at some point.

I've talked about some of the inspiration for making up the personalities and jobs of Voryn's brothers, but here's a few more details:

• Uthol - His dialogue says "I cannot remember you at all", which I kind of interpret as him having a bit of memory scrambling going on, but it also made me think that maybe he wasn't around much to see whatever was going on with Nerevar. He also says he has "always done his [Voryn's] bidding," and seems rather ambivalent about the Nerevarine and their decisions as a whole, so while it didn't come up much, I thought of him as a character who was content to take on the work Voryn asked him to and not someone who was eager to lead the House himself.


• Endus - His dialogue pretty much consists of giving you some Dagoth brandy, so that's where him being in charge of agricultural holdings (and alcohol) came from, and between that and him being one of the older brothers, he ended up taking on a more family-centric role.


• Gilvoth - I think everyone writes him as being surly and not liking Nerevar based on the three whole sentences of FIGHT ME he has lol. Even his Hand/Wrath spells both have two pretty straightforward damage health/fatigue spells. He is also the last Ash Vampire to be found, right before you reach Dagoth Ur himself, which is where I was inspired to give him a protective streak (which comes out early on when Vemyn is disrespectful of Uthol's betrothed).


• Vemyn - as mentioned previously, I had some difficult figuring out how Gilvoth and Vemyn should differ early on, and their dialogue doesn't help too much here. Vemyn is given the responsibility of protecting Sunder, and he's not quite as direct and to the point about telling you to shut up, so he developed into still being grumpy but also someone involved in a lot of the management of the House, and part of his grumpiness earlier in the story also stemming from having lost out on Voryn's position.


• Voryn - as my notes still say: "Our protagonist :)"


• Odros - he didn't end up having a ton to do in this fic, but I wrote him as being somewhat calming towards his brothers and more inclined towards religion and rites than Voryn based on his dialogue, which has a more religious tone and is conciliatory toward the Nerevarine.


• Araynys - his dialogue gives very little to go off, but he's the only one of the Ash Vampires placed outside of the Ghostfence, so I went from that to him always being the one doing work outside of Dagoth territory.


• Tureynul - also not very helpful dialogue, but Tureynulal is the one that has Kagrenac's library, so I gave him a more scholarly inclination from that.

Stats:
The average length of a chapter was about 6.3k. The shortest is chapter 1 at about 3.8k, and the longest is chapter 29 at 10.3k. The first few chapters were generally a bit shorter. I wrote the whole thing in one document, and with the proper chapter headings and page breaks between chapters, it is 460 pages. At some point, it did start taking a few seconds to load in all the way!

I am still not entirely sure how this fic ran away so impressively from 2.5 scenes to 43 chapters.

For fun, here are the number of times some of the character names were used:

• Voryn: 3693 + 6 of "Dagoth Ur"


• Nerevar/Neht: 2858


• Almalexia/Ayem: 1011 (note that I also needed to use her name less, because she has different pronouns than Nerevar and Voryn)


• Sil/Seht: 271


• Vivec/Vehk: 316


• Alandro: 44


• Dumac: 164


• Uthol: 86


• Endus: 208


• Gilvoth: 222 (winner of the 'most frequently mentioned brother' award)


• Vemyn: 185


• Odros: 51


• Araynys: 76


• Tureynul: 153

One last thought:
It's a little weird to finally post the last chapter of this fic after having it eat at my brain for over a year. To be honest, I didn't really expect the reception this fic was lucky enough to receive, and at times it was a little overwhelming in a good way. So thank you to everyone who read along, left a comment, or hit that kudos button. It's been a long time since I've enjoyed working on a WIP this much, and posting this was one of the most fun experiences I've had in fandom. ♥